So here's the thing:
Every time I thought about starting a blog, the thing that stopped me was being afraid of having nothing to say, or nothing to write about. I thrive on consistency, and I knew I'd want to write one blog post a week. Even though I knew I could technically do whatever I wanted with the blog, I wasn't sure I'd be able to come up with one topic to write about a week.
I finally decided to take the plunge when I launched my website, because would anyone really notice/care if I skipped a week here and there? What's more: not starting a blog was stressing me out more than the prospect of choosing topics. I was the one holding myself back, so I just said "f it" and wrote a blog post. And now here we are, on my third one. Amazing!
I wasn't sure what I was going to write on this blog post (surprise!) until I woke up a few days ago with an email from my mom which has made me cry every time I've read it.
I've told more than one person that they're "my biggest fan"; not because I'm trying to lie to people, but because there are several people in my life who I really feel like are my biggest fans. (There can be more than one, right?)
But the true biggest fan, without a doubt, is my sweet mother. The one who has supported me in every way possible since the day I was born. The one who sat outside in the cold with me while I asked passer-bys if they wanted to buy chocolate bars, and the one who bought me more duct tape then you'd ever care to own when I was in sixth grade for duct tape pens. The one who supported me when I wanted to be a teacher, and the one who supported me when I decided I didn't. The one who has been my 100th, 200th, and 300th sales. The one who I'm so grateful to have in my life every single day.
My mom is such a ray of sunshine in this world; she can have a conversation with anyone and make you feel so so special. Her hugs are 10/10 and she is the kindest person on the face of this Earth. I'm the worst when it comes to words (which is ironic considering that I majored in English), but she knows that I love her to the ends of the earth.
But one of my favorite things about my mom is that she is adorably clueless when it comes to technology. In a conversation once about my brother's computer, my mom was asked if he had Windows, and her response was "yeah, he has about five." She also uses 'google image' as a verb ("did you try google imaging it?"). I'm not saying this to make fun of her; she's blissfully ignorant when it comes to technology, and she'll happily admit that.
So why am I telling you this?
Because she had no idea what a blog was until I started mine. And she was under the impression that anyone could just make posts on my blog; she thought she just didn't know how. So instead, she emailed it to me. She's insisted that I share it with you all. So without further ado:
Subject: "Mama's Blog Letter"
Hello my Darling, this is your Mama,
I'm not sure what a blog is, or how to do it so I'm sending this by email for you to post on your website. I know what a blob is, and that's what I washed out of your cheer uniform after you sold all those chocolate candy bars at Hastings. I have a picture of you that the Manager took posing in your cheer outfit if your many friends on the internet want to see it. You've always been a 'go getter', starting from the time I carried you and your twin brother those long agonizing nine months. Actually, it was mostly the last final month that was so tiring. I grew 5 ft around. Almost round as I am tall. I looked like a walking box. You two started out weighing the same, but as my pregnancy progressed you out grew him by leeps and bounds. Poor Keegan, he only weighed around 5 lbs and you were 8 lbs.
I'd like all your computer peeps to know how proud I am of you and let them know that I'm witnessing the many long hours and love you put into what you are doing. Your Dad always says, "find something you love to do and you'll never work a day in your life" That's the main reason we weren't too upset when you broke the news to us that you decided not to be an English Teacher. Although, it's a good degree to have because your 'blogs' are punctuated and articulated very well. (please resist the temptation to make punctuation and grammar corrections on this letter.)
I enjoyed looking through your new website and seeing how beautiful your pictures turned out. You're welcome to use my chickens for back drops and Mr. Goat won't mind if you hang a mug on his horns for your friends to see. I'm sure there are many people out there that live in the country and would like to see Mr. Goat. I noticed you used several acronyms in your 'blog'. I don't know what a lot of them mean. I asked your brother what 'AF' was and he told me I wouldn't want to know. So...If it's a bad word, please remember that it's not lady like to use bad words.
The rooster is crowing and I hear your Father stirring so I will close for now. I love you sweetheart. Keep moving forward without any fear and remember the sign I had on the mantle for you and your siblings that said, " Sometimes you just have to take the leap and build your wings on the way down."
Love, Mom
- We don't have a farm; just several farm animals. My mom thinks they'd make great photo backdrops; I'm not sure she understands good SEO practices.
- I'm thinking no one should tell her that normal people don't actually use the word "peeps."
- If she asks, we can tell her AF stands for "alcohol free"; I'm sure that's a term she could get behind.
- She sent this a day after I had doubts bigger than I ever experienced. I read it, cried a lot, then printed and hung it up. I never told her about my doubts, but I guess her spidey senses were tingling.
Comments
Hello Kendra and Aunt Lee..this is the most loving and endearing thing I’ve read in a while. You’re love for each other shines through and it made me cry also(tears of joy!!) Kyndra, you’ve been an inspiration and great motivation for me. I’ve had many doubts myself. And reading your process as you move forward, I’ve had many of the same feelings, worries, doubts and fears(still do on some level), I just can’t articulate them as well as you and probably should share more to get the help I need. Instead I try to do everything myself..which is all fine and dandy, but your openness and sharing has helped me more than you know. Keep being you sweet girl! LeeAnn, i love you to the ends of the universe and back. The world needs more people like you. Love always, Marie
I’m in tears after reading this. I hope to be the same kind of sweet and supportive mom to my daughter. You are so blessed to have such a wonderful mama!